Now I know everyone has a few of these and I just thought I might share it with you so that you might not feel so stupid and embarrassed. I should also state that there are lots of these and if you look up Polled Herefords in my blog you will find one of my stories where I was very embarrassed.
So let me set the stage a little. When I was in the first grade I was considered a monster because I was very tall for my age but by the second grade I was over five feet tall. No exaggerations here either and you can call Jon Tanny Olsen, Jimmy Heath, Denise Logue or Hugh Allen Jones and even Joy Fink (Frank). Yes this is my ENTIRE class for the first 8 grades accept that Joy was confused a lot and she went to Shidler and then Grainola and then Shidler and so on and so forth. She was good looking but the problem was she was a lot too smart and as a percentage when she showed up I was moved way down the class rankings. Basically we were the Grainola 5 and sometimes 6. One time we did have 7 when Ralph showed up but he did not stay too long. The good thing about Ralph is that he was big like me so I was not the only giant. The way I knew I was over five feet tall is Mrs. Casselman marked on the door our heights and she made a big deal out of how big I was. She was 5'2" and we were almost the same height. Mrs. Shumate, my 3rd, 4th and 5th grade teacher was barely five foot tall. Did I tell you the Mrs. Casselman was my first and second grade teacher? OK, back to the story.
Each year Christmas was a bit production and we did plays/acting. I should also point out that we said the pledge to the flag every morning and prayed before class every day and sang songs that were motivational and about God and country. I guess I might as well admit that I am POed about everyone wants me to be sensitive to their opinions and beliefs but they don't want to be sensitive to mine. My opinion is we were better off when the majority won and in general God and country were more important. Family and discipline were primary and children were guilty until proven innocent. OK, OK! Back to the embarrassing moment. Those Christmas productions required me to memorize things I did not want to memorize and dress like I did not want to dress and be up in front of everyone I knew like I did not want to do but I did it because I was told to do it and I would have been in big trouble if I did not. It is called fear and discipline. Well this one year I was an elf and being way bigger than I was supposed to be for my age I was big all over if you know what I mean and they made me dress in a tight fitting leotard and stretchy shirt with funky antlers but it was all brown. It was HUMILIATING! Also every time I put on that outfit it just seemed to get smaller. It was always getting in my crack, if you know what I mean. But even worse is that my mother had one of those Polaroid instant cameras that was huge. She took pictures during the play and one of them was showing me trying to get that tight leotard out of my crack. Out of all the pictures she never lost or threw away that was the one. I would pay even today for it to be tossed. Luckily I don't know where it is.
So I think you can see why this one tops the list. It messed me up for life. Lately I have been involved in Toastmasters which is a club to help folks learn how to speak in public. Everyone thinks I am a great speaker and I will have to tell you it makes me nervous and sweat every time. Anyway one of the girls in the club suggested that I am an introvert that cannot hide. I think she is right. I find it easy to talk to folks but difficult to stay with it. In fact what I really am good at is analysis and problem solving. I prefer not to ever get in an argument as I think everyone is better at talking and articulating their thoughts even when I know the facts better than they do. I find it interesting in life that I am a financial planner who studies investments and helps folks plan their financial futures but never find it easy to just talk to folks. I think I really am an introvert but desire to talk to folks. Confusing for you? What about me? I have to deal with it and it all goes back to being a giant elf in a skin tight leotard that was too small. I never grew out of it, so to speak.
Well what do you learn in the Osage?
Thanks for your time,
So let me set the stage a little. When I was in the first grade I was considered a monster because I was very tall for my age but by the second grade I was over five feet tall. No exaggerations here either and you can call Jon Tanny Olsen, Jimmy Heath, Denise Logue or Hugh Allen Jones and even Joy Fink (Frank). Yes this is my ENTIRE class for the first 8 grades accept that Joy was confused a lot and she went to Shidler and then Grainola and then Shidler and so on and so forth. She was good looking but the problem was she was a lot too smart and as a percentage when she showed up I was moved way down the class rankings. Basically we were the Grainola 5 and sometimes 6. One time we did have 7 when Ralph showed up but he did not stay too long. The good thing about Ralph is that he was big like me so I was not the only giant. The way I knew I was over five feet tall is Mrs. Casselman marked on the door our heights and she made a big deal out of how big I was. She was 5'2" and we were almost the same height. Mrs. Shumate, my 3rd, 4th and 5th grade teacher was barely five foot tall. Did I tell you the Mrs. Casselman was my first and second grade teacher? OK, back to the story.
Each year Christmas was a bit production and we did plays/acting. I should also point out that we said the pledge to the flag every morning and prayed before class every day and sang songs that were motivational and about God and country. I guess I might as well admit that I am POed about everyone wants me to be sensitive to their opinions and beliefs but they don't want to be sensitive to mine. My opinion is we were better off when the majority won and in general God and country were more important. Family and discipline were primary and children were guilty until proven innocent. OK, OK! Back to the embarrassing moment. Those Christmas productions required me to memorize things I did not want to memorize and dress like I did not want to dress and be up in front of everyone I knew like I did not want to do but I did it because I was told to do it and I would have been in big trouble if I did not. It is called fear and discipline. Well this one year I was an elf and being way bigger than I was supposed to be for my age I was big all over if you know what I mean and they made me dress in a tight fitting leotard and stretchy shirt with funky antlers but it was all brown. It was HUMILIATING! Also every time I put on that outfit it just seemed to get smaller. It was always getting in my crack, if you know what I mean. But even worse is that my mother had one of those Polaroid instant cameras that was huge. She took pictures during the play and one of them was showing me trying to get that tight leotard out of my crack. Out of all the pictures she never lost or threw away that was the one. I would pay even today for it to be tossed. Luckily I don't know where it is.
So I think you can see why this one tops the list. It messed me up for life. Lately I have been involved in Toastmasters which is a club to help folks learn how to speak in public. Everyone thinks I am a great speaker and I will have to tell you it makes me nervous and sweat every time. Anyway one of the girls in the club suggested that I am an introvert that cannot hide. I think she is right. I find it easy to talk to folks but difficult to stay with it. In fact what I really am good at is analysis and problem solving. I prefer not to ever get in an argument as I think everyone is better at talking and articulating their thoughts even when I know the facts better than they do. I find it interesting in life that I am a financial planner who studies investments and helps folks plan their financial futures but never find it easy to just talk to folks. I think I really am an introvert but desire to talk to folks. Confusing for you? What about me? I have to deal with it and it all goes back to being a giant elf in a skin tight leotard that was too small. I never grew out of it, so to speak.
Well what do you learn in the Osage?
- being embarrassed once in a while is good for your humility quotient
- I am only one standard deviation from being a total recluse - figure that one out will you?
- That play would have been rated R based on that costume if it were today
- Bad stuff happens - get over it
Thanks for your time,
gary@thepioneerman.com
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